MuLtiTaSkiNg GoNe BaD

It's OK by Me :)

2009-02-19T22:01:00.000-08:00

Listening to Imogen Heap - Speeding Cars. This song is about a person who got cheated on for a while and that person knew that their significant other was cheating. It's over and this song is saying that they should move on because in life it's going to be hard obstacles such as this but you will go on. Well, it's nice song because it can relate to so many people who've had their hearts broken.

I belive this is about heartache whether it be from a ex or from family issues or maybe just feeling alone. She is talking about that day when it's all just too much and you can't handle it anymore. When you're tired of hurting and you want it all to stop before you go insane. That's why this song means so much to me.

When i first heard it sunk into my heart because it was so perfect for where i was in my life at that point. She's truly just trying to give everyone advice to live life for all it's worth and to be the best you can be, but still know that you'll never be perfect.

It's a really beautiful song if you listen to the melody and take a second to think about the lyrics. This song reminds me of high school. I could be a bit biased, considering this song played when the kids on the OC graduated in season 3, but the song is really well-fit for graduations, and just growing up and moving on in general.

LYRICS Imogen Heap - Speeding Cars

Here's the day you hoped would never come
Don't feed me violins
just run with me through rows of speeding cars.

The papercuts the cheating lovers
The coffee's never strong enough
i know you think it's more than just bad luck

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't lose your head
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

Sleeping pills know sleeping dogs lie
never far enough away
Glistening in the cold sweat of guilt
I've watched you slowly winding down for years
You can't keep on like this...now's a bad a time as any

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't kill yourself
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

it's ok by me..it was a long time ago
it's ok by me..it was a long time ago

p/s - Alin, Mc, Eli, Anis..this song goes to you :)

ALENG tagged ME!

2009-02-12T11:54:00.001-08:00

Rules: It's harder than it looks! Copy to your own note, erase my answers, enter yours, and tag 10 people. Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real...nothing made up! If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question.Have fun!

1. What is your name?Intan :)
2. A four letter word:Idle~
3. A boy's name:Ikhwan ;)
4. A girl's name:Iman
5. An occupation:Inventor
6. A color:Ivory
7. Something you wear:Issey Miyake edc :D
8. A food:Italian Pasta(nyum!)
9. Something found in the bathroom:Image in d mirror (wth?)
10. A place:Ireland
11. A reason for being late:Incident
12. Something you shout:Impressive!
13. A movie title:It!
14. Something you drink:Ice Lemon Tea :D
15. A musical group:Incubus :)
16. A street name:Indian Street
17. A type of car:Impreza :P~
18. A song title:I HATE Everything About You - Three Days Grace
19. A verb:IMAGINE
20. I hate tagging ppl, if interested,please do so

Kun Fayakun ( Be, and it is)

2009-02-10T23:52:00.000-08:00

Mary wonders at how she shall give birth to a child and the answer given is Kun Fayakun. Obviously, this is not referring to an instant process but rather a gradual process.

3:47. She said: "O my Lord! How shall I have a son when no man has touched me." He said: "So (it will be) for Allâh creates what He wills. When He has decreed something, He says to it only: "Be!" and it is.

Mary in Islam (مريم "Maryam" in Arabic), the mother of Jesus, is venerated as a righteous woman. She is mentioned more times in the Qur'an than in the entire New Testament. According to the Qur'an, Jesus (called 'Isa in Arabic) was born miraculously by the will of God without a father. His mother is regarded as a chaste and virtuous woman and is a highly respected figure in Islam. The Qur'an states that Jesus was the result of a virgin birth, but that neither Mary nor her son was divine.

In the Qur'an, no other woman is given more attention than Mary. The nineteenth sura of the Qur'an is named after her and is, to some extent, about her life. Of the Qur'an's 114 suras, she is among only eight people who have a sura named after them. In Islam, she is generally referred to as Maryam, Umm Isa (Mary, the mother of Jesus). For Muslims she is a symbol of submission to God and piety.

Mary is one of the most highly-regarded women in Islam; there are several verses in the Qur'an praising her and confirming that she was an extremely chaste and pious woman. I wish , I could be strong as her as I AM also a MARYAM :)

Dua' :)

2009-02-09T23:06:00.000-08:00

I am sinned. I hold hatred and revenge in my heart, deeply. When they meet anger it gone to sumthing BAD, sumthing really-really-really BAD. I regret everything after that. I wished I could reverse my time and turned everything right. But what's done are done. I could only pray that I cud fix myself and become someone BETTER. In my times, I find many reasons why I did not make Dua; I forgot, didn’t know how, or just do not think it will be answered. Fundamental to this was the loss of dependence and trust upon Allah. As a Muslim there is something very wrong when I believed my Duas won’t be answered. I did not turn to Allah in my times of need and instead put my trust, dependence and hopes on worldly things that I thot will help me. My FAULT i know. I always realize that.

Dua is the key to everything in life; key to all human needs - be it in this world or hereafter. However, being human as I am, I was always in a haste whenever I made dua to Allah (SWT) and expect an immediate answer.With making Dua and comes Sabr and lots more Sabr, I have become a people who wants instant gratification, I am used to pressing the buttons and getting what I want NOW. Dua does not work that way as we all know - the secret tool here is sabr….. The most important thing I shud note that once dua is done concensiously with good intentions, be guaranteed that SWT will answer it. I may not see immediate result or get what I asked for but surely I will be answered. As a human I may not know whether what I was asking for from Allah (SWT) is the best for me at the time of my need(s) or not. Allah therefore knows the best for me at ALL TIMES and may decide to provide me with something else instead of what I asked for. A fren, a really good fren reminds me of that. Thanks DEAR :)

I admit sometimes I become afraid of the evil around me and I am not sure sometimes how to become stronger. I know we should only fear Allah, but i know sometimes I become weak to my fears. Sometime I have often wondered, why my life seem so difficult, but as I look back, I see Allah was in front of me all the time. I can go on and on with all the things that Allah give to me and do for me. To say thank you is not enough. Though my times have been hard and still are many now, my thoughts are always that Allah see all and now all things and Allah’s word is the last word.

Allah Almighty says in the Qur’an:
“When my servants ask you concerning me, (tell them) I am indeed close (to them). I listen to the prayer of every suppliant when he calls on me.” [2:186]

May Allah bless us all and guide us to the right direction. Please pray for me that I won't do anymore STUPID things, anymore WASTE of my life. I love myself and I love you all :)

2009, Year of Ignorance

2009-02-09T07:57:00.000-08:00

Hello world, do u miss me??

2009, What I've learned this year?

IGNORANCE...

Yes, it's a bliss...

And you dear blog,

I know you feel it too...

Hurt don't you?

Feeling like thrown away...

But hey, 2009 shud be a cheer to us,

so, come on, if u feel rejected,

Not needed or sumthing...

I'll be there...always be there

Just find me...chase me, cause I'm running and NOT ignoring..

chasing my so called bright future...

I might forget, I might preoccupied with things,

But do remind me...

Once a friend always a friend...

Promise to dear friends,

I'll always be there :)

AND I WON'T IGNORE , promise

Tagged Virus

2008-11-28T01:08:00.000-08:00

[*] 7 Fakta tentang saya
~23 years old
~First in the family
~Study EE engineering in UTP (n i hate that!)
~Single and available ( huahuahuahua!)
~Kelantanese :D
~reckless driver
~ego n emo

[*] 7 Perkara menakutkan saya di dunia
~Death
~God's Ad-Dunya punishment
~People's talkings and fitna'
~Lost love..Love lost
~the lost of FAITH
~Hatred and revenge
~responsibility

[*] 7 Lagu buat masa sekarang
~Imogen Heap - Speeding Cars
~One Republic - Come Home
~Nickelback - Gotta Be Somebody
~Lifehouse - Whatever It Takes
~Saving Jane - Supergirl
~The Bravery - Time Won't Let Me Go
~Delta Goodrem - Lost Without You

[*] 7 Perkara selalu sebut.
~Ntah
~Ye la Kot
~Damn
~Tak Kesah
~Sial
~Sukeati
~Tape la

[*] 7 Perkara yang amat bernilai.
~Life
~Pride
~Love
~Time
~Experience
~Knowledge
~Faith

[*] 7 Pertama kali dalam hidup saya7 org bertuah menjawab tag ni.
~Kamu
~Dia
~Mereka
~Sesape yg membaca
~Sesape yg ingin menjawap
~Ntah
~...........

Mushroom in the Rain

2008-11-24T00:10:00.000-08:00

Picking mushroom..
In cats and dogs rain..
Eating mushroom soup..
While watching the rain falling like pain..
Hot..Sweet..Comforting..

Thanks Opah :)

p/s- manage to get a bucket full of mushrooms..yeay~

LOST

2008-11-06T17:57:00.000-08:00

Remember me?..

Nope, not even the IE cookies.

Guys..I won't Date

2008-10-12T04:32:00.000-07:00

1) Perverts, Perverts, Perverts
Ok, i know guys cudn't run away from thinking about sex. Sex thinking and boy are like twins that never can be seperated from their birth to their death. Natural Bronte..Normal I sed.I don't care what you guys think of me or other girls..just, keep it to urself!Please don't step over the limit of talking and beware of your act!Show some respect!Don't you ever think you can easily touch me except you are someone to me! Get my attention,get to knoe me, prove you love me, marry me and you can talk and do what ever you want!Don't just be a dickhead!

2) Smokers who smoke in front of people
You want to be dead earlier than me, go ahead!Just don't drag me with you!Smoke with your friends, smoke outside my house, I don't care...just makesure you are far-far away from me!I don't want to end up in the clinic..inhaled once again..I can't even stand the smell of the smoke from the 2nd party shirt.. how i can live my life with this type of guys?

3)Sweet talkers and Liars
Cakap tak serupa bikin.What I got only promises and lies..Janji tinggal janji!More than words is all I need!Enough said!

Balik After Raya - Lebuhraya Timur Barat

2008-10-07T06:37:00.000-07:00

The journey was hazy. From Jeli to Gerik the road was full with mist and fog; raining cats and dogs. But we; Asmah and me were having fun skodeng this yellow volkswagen along the way..It was YELLOW!classy isn't it?owh,I'm so into old school and retro style...I love vespa, I love volkswagen (which i used to call kereta bug bug when i was small, maybe because it looks like a creepy-crawly beetle), I love thick framed spectacles, I love Jack Purcell shoes and The Beetles and also VANS...The driver and passenger seemed cute too! So, if you are one of them or have a track of the owner of this modified-engine-shooting-volksie please contact 017-PERASAN..haha..I'll be waiting ;-)

Stopped by at Banding Island for a while for a photo snapping session..The dead tree and the lake sangat menareks.I'm gonna have a Belum forest holiday sumday..yerp sumday..any nature lover out there? anyone join? :) Life; there's a LOT to explore!

VVIP vs us

2008-10-03T22:15:00.000-07:00

Ridel Hotel Cafe.The location;Kelantan's Riverview, nice. But the service and the taste was HORRIBLE, didn't deserve the expensive charge we paid!"We need to serve the Dato' first before come to you.Wait for a while.." I still remember what the waiter said..Hello? A while? We waited there for almost an hour!Sangat teruk!Well, maybe we are not the VVIP but still we are your customer!I mean, WAS your customer!Still, was having fun snapping picture there :D

Yellow~

2008-10-02T08:29:00.000-07:00

I was trying to snap the shadow of me on the car's screen when a moving school van passed by.And it was yellow... :D

p/s - Listening to Coldplay - Yellow :)

Family is All About...

2008-10-02T02:59:00.000-07:00

F - Fun and Celebration

A - Always there for each other

M - Moment of togetherness

I - Innumerable stories

L - Lots of sweet moments

Y - Years and memories

Family is about these and MORE :)

The warmth and loving presence

makes our family all the MORE special :)

Happy Eid Mubarak!

Sorry Body and Soul

The Third Generation

2008-10-02T01:33:00.000-07:00

Abang Li's - Fatin, Farini, Alif
Kak Zah's - Dayana, Imanina , Qayyum
Kak Mah's - Ainun, Arif, Adam
Kak Ma's - Aisyah

:D

Sangat suke budak-budak

tunggu turn aku lak nk dapat anak~ hahaha

entah bile.....

Mau jadi kanak-kanak semula..

Time..is sumthing u can't rewind- Lillix

Bunga Api :D

2008-09-29T06:59:00.000-07:00

Selamat Hari Raya...Hari untuk kita bersuka ria...so true!..I'm having fun :D

Soooo in Raya mood!Salam Aidilfitri people!Maaf Zahir & Batin :)

Sleeping In the Closet

2008-09-28T02:20:00.000-07:00

I have a weird habit;

Sleeping in the closet.

I am a Agoraphobic, I think.

I have the fear of open places and crowds.

I HATE when someone left the door open!

In the closet I am, feeling safe and secure.

The feeling like someone is holding, hugging me,

And watching me... sleeping thru d nite.

the dark, sometimes is a peace.

Yes, COMFORT :)

Grand Iftar 2008, UTP

2008-09-19T15:10:00.000-07:00

Gendang gendut tali kecapi,

Kenyang perut suke hati :)

Mase kechik : Tak baek makan tak habes, nanti nasik nanges...

Mase besa : Tak baek makan tak habes, sebijik nasik umpama setitik peluh petani...

Macam-macam :D

My first and last iftar in UTP...and I was full~ nyummy :)

Ayeem, 1968

2008-09-17T11:31:00.001-07:00

Sah, aku tade keje..still, dis didn't suit my face sgt but ni la yang paling OK.. :D

Try la for fun..(dis advice ONLY for people yg tade keje cam aku!hehe)

TROPIKA

2008-09-14T08:49:00.000-07:00

Alas..Out of UTP for a while for bebuke puase at TROPIKA..But still, ONLY for a while :(

Kak Su, Yani, Semoh and Ayeem :)

The View

2008-09-13T10:27:00.000-07:00

It's just I'm feeling lonely tonight,

I look out my window and this what I see;

The view I always see,

The view I want to get rid off ASAP,

YES, I HATE UTP!

Confession

2008-09-07T14:49:00.000-07:00

Hi,

I have a confession to make;

I AM AFRAID

I'm afraid of responsibility.

I'm afraid of expectation.

I'm afraid of failure.

I'm afraid of love.

I'm afraid of tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow.

I'm afraid of the future.

I AM AFRAID OF LIFE...

Be Strong by Delta Goodrem

2008-09-01T19:15:00.000-07:00

Are you swimming upstream in oceans of blue?
Do you feel like your sinking?
Are you sick of the rain after all you've been through?
Well I know what you're thinking
When you can't take it
You can make it
Sometime soon I know you'll see

'cause when your in you're darkest hour
And all of the light just fades away
When you're like a single flower whose colours have turned to shades of gray
Well hang on and be strong

Where taking each step one day at a time
You can't loose your spirit
Let live and let live forget and forgive
It's all how you see it
And just remember keep it together
Don't you know you're never alone

'cause when you're in your darkest hour
And all of the light just fades away
When you're like a single flower whose colours have turned to shades of gray
Well hang on, and be strong

No you're not defeated
And soon you'll be smiling once again
Then you won't have to feel it
Let it go with the wind
Time passes us by
And know that you're aloud to cry

'cause when you're in your darkest hour
And all of the light just fades away
When you're like a single flower whose colours have turned to shades of gray
Well hang on and be strong

Ramadhan Al-Mubarak

2008-09-01T01:39:00.000-07:00

This is my home sweet home :)

Google Earth stolen map..hahaha

Salam Ramadhan to all..the month i've been missing.. :) Lets all together of us cherish the month..tingkatkan amal.. terawikh! berpuasa.. and please dun skip any if it wasn't needed..please2.. i still dun understand why this certain PEOPLE need to..haish..what I miss the most right now is Kelantan's food..any kueh2..i want to go back home..and taste all of em.. heee :D Anyway this is an invitation for my frens around Kota bharu or Kelantan.. do visit my house for Hari Raya.. i got the map and my house pic up there.. I'll be waiting!!And we can do dis from house to house tour :D Happy Fasting people!May ALLAHs blessing be upon you and your family in the holy month of Ramadhan :)

p/s - Tiada hari seindah JUMAAT, Tiada kata seindah ZIKIR, Tiada ibadah seindah SOLAT, Tiada bulan seindah RAMADHAN :)

MERDEKA!!

2008-08-31T02:25:00.000-07:00

Happy Independence Day Malaysia~ 31st August 2008 Malaysia Celebrate its 50+1 years of Independence..Happy Birthday Malaysia :D In nearly every year, a brand new theme and logo were made for the celebration of the Independence Day of Malaysia.. This year theme Perpaduan Teras Kejayaan (Unity Is The Core of Success).. but what actually merdeka means to me?;

- OUT of UTP..that means graduating..this place is HELL! :P~

- FREEDOM to choose my own way and my own path in dealing with my life!

- FREE from back talkers who thinks they are PERFECT.. Mind your own business please?

- Being SINGLE..hahaha means no more couple constraints..yeah!

- Living my life HAPPILY with my family and close friends :)

Oh yeah Ayeem Rockks! :D

p/s - the only year i missed the fireworks show...wuuu~

Curiosity killed the cat?

2008-08-31T00:39:00.000-07:00

Curiosity killed the cat...

Ayeem = Cat

Yup, curiosity is killing me too!

The more I know, the more I dun understand, the more I hurted!

p/s - I LOVE CATS! meowww~

Avril Lavigne live in Malaysia

2008-08-30T04:16:00.000-07:00

Heh..of course i didn't go..dis was only sumthing in my dream...someone, giving me a free VIP ticket maybe..or maybe a concert date.. maybe..ayeem,STOP... too much imagination!You'll never get one!Well, i used to like Avril a lot back then in school..what?6 years ago? :) Few of my frens said they'll remember me when they heard any Avril's..kan kerel kan?kan ude kan?kan?Sometimes i do wonder why...Concerts in Malaysia always gonna be a controversial one right?But THEY had no good reasons to ban this. To be frank, our authorities might be too strict, but not really unreasonable.There will never be a definite right or wrong for having these concerts… different people will share different point of view in the end. I just hope that people are allowed to make our choices… it’s the basic freedom.Haha ;) Avril’s concert only once in a few years (perhaps once in a lifetime) in Malaysia.and I MISSED it..due to CONSTRAINTS..and CONSTRAINTS... and more CONSTRAINTS..

p/s- I dun think Avril is sexy..She dun even haf the BODY..hahahaha!

Colors :D

2008-08-29T03:09:00.000-07:00

Alin : Ayeem, ko tade baju kaler laen ke? asyik2 kaler cokelat, hitam, putih, kelabu..

Aku: Tade...

Alin: Cube ko try beli baju kaler ceria sket. Menarik sket orang nak pandang.Attract attention orang sket. Ko pon boleh happy.

Aku: Ye la.. ye la..

Yup..I guess what she said is true :) The colors of our clothes do effects our moods. And yep, people started to realize my existence..haha :) Thanks Cik Alin for the advice..See that blouses..Amek ko..Neon Color Traffic Light. Satisfied?

p/s - heh went for megasale last month.. dis what i grabbed at topshop.. topshop,yeah addictive!

weeeiiirrddd

2008-08-28T23:02:00.000-07:00

weeeiiirrrddd...

when i was with you ..

you were afraid i'm not staying..

that you were just a stop for a while?

now when i'm not with you..

you are afraid i'll be waiting..

that i won't never say goodbye?

haish~

Happy 23rd Birthday Ayeem

2008-08-28T11:43:00.000-07:00

And this shud be my birthday present for the year!

inhaling for healing :P~

I am 23 today..already an aldult i guess but still behaving like a cry baby..hahaha..And this is how i celebrate my birthday .. at the UTP clinic.. for asthma.. inhaling and an injection :D

My birthday wishes:

Graduation!

Keje!Keje!Keje!

New-Handsome-Engineer-Boyfriend!

p/s- Thank you people for the wishes especially Semah for the KFC and the gossips treat :)

Vincci

2008-08-19T12:17:00.001-07:00

I realized where my earth color addiction came from; my mom. We went to Alamanda for Kasut Raya shopping and she picked up 3 choco color shoes for three of us... and I'll be wearing a pair of wedgies dis year! yeay~

p/s - You should know how much I love BROWN and BROWNIES too! :)

Desperate Singles (?!)

2008-08-19T11:13:00.000-07:00

Kida, Bulu, Ayeem, Chepah and Aleng :D

(I'll upload the clearer pictures later)

Who I haven't seen in 6 years? Sharifah Fauziah Jap :D She flew from Kota Kinabalu to meet us.. This was maybe a small reunion of form 5 ALAMANDA doormates of 2002..we missed Syud as she was in Johor for her convocation :( those psychopaths living in a dorm..remember? where we fought, quarrelled, argued almost everyday and yet we can forgot about all those stupid thingy after 6 years.. that is what we called FRIENDSHIP :D I miss those time... movie shows at night under the bed.. The handphones charging services...The VIBRATED br***ts... etc ;)

What I love is us, being single (sorry Aleng ko excluded! :P~) so no about our boyfriends talkings and all we had was gossips, gossips and more gossips about others!e.g HE and SHE broke up..HE and SHE were back together..etc etc..haha remember Desperate Housewives? We were like those roles except we are singles! And we have the same problems like those housewives do too! haha..

Shopping, camera whoring, instant photo printing ( i had already bought the frame for the picta!) books hunting, slept over in Cititel Midvalley, problems sharing talks, The Manhattan Fish Market food testing? midnight movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall.. I'm loving it.. Thanks Chepah! :)

p/s - We still the same psychopath but we psycho only at guys not at each other..aiyakk!

Bocca della Verità

2008-08-19T05:40:00.001-07:00

Have you ever try to waste your 40 cents feeding that mouth? I did.. I was bored, trying to find out new things to update my blog... So Chepah and me decided to have that lying-detector-mouth-of- truth-electronic-coin-operated-machine to read our palms...just trying to predict the future that obviusly we CAN'T.. We shouldn't belive what was written on the result paper but we were just having fun (of course!).. And here what that Mouth of Truth told about me... :D

You have a strong constitution and can work hard (Oh No!so-not-me!)

You enjoy excellent health although you often abuse it (Any comment?!Haha ok, i eat, sleep, exercise not WELL, i admit that)

You are unparalled where precision logic and analysis are concerned (Hurm..what did he mean anyway?..couldn't understand what he trying to say here..what the hell?)

You are sometimes over idealistic and you should learn to be more cautious to avoid dissapoinment (erks, kantoi!that is so true!)

You might have an accident but there should be no serious consequences (Accident and me are fate to be together..hell, I AM clumsy!)

Someone will try to exploit your feelings to their own advantage (Sapekah?Hello?Anyone? Who is this real mo-fo..please stand up! Cam mau ngaku jek :P~)

p/s - I have good rating on my life, love, and luck (hurmm yeke? yeke?i wonder...)

V5G.L4.4.1

2008-08-14T21:21:00.000-07:00

I just cleaned up my MESS :D

P.R.O.C.R.A.S.T.I.N.A.T.I.O.N

2008-08-13T09:52:00.000-07:00

Bad attitude ayeem..very bad attitude..help me out of this!!!

Petronas Oh Petronas :D

2008-08-11T21:41:00.000-07:00

To work with Petronas or NOT to work with Petronas? Well, i dunno, i really can't decide. I'm not a successful student for sure but someone said i just shud try my best in everything i do ( I'm hoping he did so :D).. But Rezeki kan..everything is from HIM, the All-Mighty :D Help! i need some motivation, i need my confidence back!

What I think about my PETRONAS tests?

Writing test? An essay..My extracuricular activities that can assists me with my job? Haiyaa? What actually activity in UTP i really involved with? I really can't remember! All I know.. I dooz off all the time, doing nothing or just having fun with my friends :P~ Ok, I just remember.. i once involved with the convofair..what? 3 years ago.. I designed that colourful weird commitee shirts and MPP stole some of my designs for MPP shirts! (I hate them for that!) I couldn't remember such things that so i just wrote craps!and again craps!yeah craps!Oh hopefully the HRs people believe my CRAPS!

Ability test? I'm sure the HRs know I AM not ABLE. We are the first who had to do this online, some sort of guinea pig i think :D We have these practice questions and example questions where we can review the marks. From all of those quetions my average scores is 2 out of 10!And we had the timing for the real test. Out of 60 questions (I think, I couldn't remember :P) i only managed to answer 20 of them and that 20 questions were only my randomly guess! I'm not confident that any of my answers was right! Hahahaha :D The-not-able-ayeem!

OPQ (Online Personal Questionnaire) kot? I'm not sure..hehe..how should i know my answers are consistent or not? I myself too don't understand myself. I have this personality conflicts since I was small. Some people said I'm COMPLICATED to understand and to predict. Some people said my personality changes from time to time. At time I can be like this, at time I can be like dat! Some people said I have split personality. I think? I dunno what I think.. i think they are all true.. I am what people said I am :D..malas nak argue actually, karang emo! :P~

The Interview...coming... I still dunno what to wear and I think I shud go for my formal-wearings shopping.. amende tah? (tak sedar pokai!) Have to find a blazer of course..Anyone teman?I also haven't done my resumes and I left my certificates at Hanim's.. I really messed up am I?Haish~!Nemmind, I bet my turn gonna be among the last as my result is among the worst.. procrastination! hehe..well people pray for me..the hopes, the wishs, the lucks, the prayers are everything i NEED!

p/s- Oh PETRONAS, please hired me! I really can't resist the DEBT!

Batch 9802 TKC gathering 01/08/08

2008-08-11T05:26:00.000-07:00

Besties :D

The models...choose one or more? :D

FIGHT TILL THE END

God gives us faith to live through the days

and we share all the thoughts together

and it will last forever

you're the light that i see

you're the path to get through

you're the shadow stands together

it remains now and ever

*joy and pain we share

laughters and tears we care

our friends we love

all the suffering thick and thin we fight

and we'll fight till the end

the spirit stays

and all the love and care for you

we watch the days passed by us

and we're here in unity

in the moments of fear

my friend, don't shed a tear

we will gain our strenght together

walk in hands, never fail to understand

Repeat *

there will be timesdays will go by so fast

and our friendship means so much to us

there will be time

when it's time for us to leave

I WILL MISS YOU TOO MUCH TILL IT HURTS

Repeat *

p/s - I dunno what to write about the gath. Maybe because it is already past a week so i forget the details.If i could i want to write all those 5 years memories i had here..sumthing i really treasure :) maybe later hahaha suddenly, i miss the batch song..wah windu nyanyi ramai-ramai :(

Weekend Gateway 3/08/2008

2008-08-10T21:29:00.000-07:00

This is my happiness, being with frens :D

Vandalisme, i miss being a kid..no worries, no problems, no stupid issues!

I drank singa-beng here :D

The nutritionist, the teacher, the software engineer, the immigration officer,the geologist, the chemical researcher, and the student (aku la tuh!) I had a great time...over night at Anis's. makan-makan at Thai resty, camera whoring at playground park, midnight movie Ayat-ayat Cinta,monorail biseng ride, jalan-jalan Bukit Bintang, megasale, shopping at pavillion, topshop!topshop! (i'm a topshop addict!), food hunting, sundae and banana split at johnny's, bracelets sharing-bought, camera whoring again at Bintang Walk :D ..I'm gonna miss all this :(

p/s - sorry people, belated post.. stupid UTP internet connection..blame ITMS! :P~

Boys + Girls = No Friends ?

2008-08-10T11:14:00.000-07:00

Ok, i have this problem..all my friendship with guys always, yup always came to an end.. I dunno if boy and girl friendship really works.. well, especially for me.. like my bestfriends, guys bestfriends will come to this stupid-stupid conflicts..as example;

Mr A and I..He said we are bestfriends. We really were, till I started to have feelings for him. Then the problem came. He realized that. Maybe he was afraid because he didn't any feeling for me so he ran away.. And the ignorance started.. The end of a friendship.. I barely know him nowdays. Maybe we are just a stanger now. Maybe we can't even be friends; FOREVER!

Oh, so then here came Mr B..We are bestfriends, he said. Yup, we really were, till he started to have feeling for me..and I didn't! OK, we could really be friends, I woudn't run away. But he couldn't. Maybe to look at me and to talk to me without hiding that feeling was something.. something really hard to do. So he ran away. The second ignorance started again...

Then, Mr C came in to save the day. Bestfriends who had feeling for each other :) we had the same interest, we did the same things, we loved the same meals, we even finished each other words!So we decided to start dating!To involved feelings in friendships is what i always wish for; my boyfriend as my bestfriend. But he couldn't maybe. I was still swearing and cursing like no other his friends' girlfriends. I still liked to hang around with him commenting about other girls' butt. I didn't like him to call me darling or baby or honey as that wasn't what he called me before. I always wanted to join him and his friends activities. Where he found annoying!I wanted to tell him stories about other guys i was flirting with. But he couldn't accept it...Then it's over; both, the relationship and friendship. He said we still can be friends but the fact, he is ignoring me...

Last but not least, Mr D...we didn't had feeling for each other..But the friendships kept people talking. My 'the one' thinks it was not appropriate and his 'the one' can not approve it.So, without futher a due it's over... one more ignorance to deal with :D

p/s - When I watched Made of Honour.. I always imagine my boyfriend as my bestfriend..Maybe I am too OVERROMANTICIZING; yerp, another way to push the love away :P~

My Playlist

2008-08-09T23:54:00.000-07:00

My winamp playlist...the songs that i keep shuffling on my computer's speakers..here the list by 08/08/08..my fav..songs that made i cry, the songs that made laugh, the songs that made me sings, the songs that made me dance :D

Boys Like Girls - Thunder (Acoustic version)

Chris Daughtry - What About Now

Coldplay - Viva La Vida

David Cook - Time Of My Life

Delta Goodrem - In This Life

Finger Eleven - Paralyzer

Flyleaf - All Around Me

Gavin DeGraw - In Love With A Girl

Gavin Rossdale - Love Remains the Same

Kate Perry - I Kissed A Girl

India Arie - The Heart Of The Matter

Jason Mraz - Lucky (feat. Colbie Caillat)

Buckcherry - Sorry

Yael Naim - New Soul

The Ting Tings - That's Not My Name

Rihanna - Disturbia

Rihanna - Take A Bow

The Pussycat Dolls - When I Grow Up

Paramore - That's What You Get

Sara Bareilles - Bottle It Up

Incubus - I Miss You ( Acoustic)

Jesse McCartney - Leavin'

Jason Mraz - I'm Yours

John Mayer - Say

Jonas Brothers - Burnin' Up

Jordin Sparks - One Step At A Time

The Last Goodnight - Stay Beautiful

Leona Lewis - Better In Time

Lifehouse - Whatever It Takes

Lily Allen - Smile

Mariah Carey - Bye, Bye

Marie Digby - Say It Again

Maroon 5 - If I Never See Your Face Again (feat Rihanna)

Miley Cyrus - Seven Things

Natasha Bedingfield - Pocketful Of Sunshine

New Kids On The Block - Summertime

Panic At The Disco - Nine In The Afternoon

Seether - Rise Above This

Secondhand Serenade - Fall For You

Duffy - Mercy

Colbie Caillat - Realize

Colbie Caillat - The Little Things

Natasha Bedingfield - Soulmate

Panic At The Disco - Nine In The Afternoon

The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus - Face Down

Avenged Sevenfold - Dear God

3 Doors Down - It's Not My Time

Danity Kane - Damaged

p/s - I dreamt of being a DJ pulak and having my own radio station..wth? paddy, join? :P~

Happy Belated Friendshipday!

2008-08-05T21:20:00.000-07:00

Dearest Friends,

Keep your eyes upon me, keep me in your sight, Help me don the crooked road, lead me to the light. The road I'm on is dark, I'm not sure if I know the way, Yet with you right beside me, I'm certain I won't stray. Protect me from the world, I know we'll make it through, Give me all the strength I need..... Let me lean on you.

I'd like to be the sort of friend that you have been to me. . . I'd like to be the help you've always been glad to be; I'd like to mean as much to you each minute of the day, as you have meant, old friend of mine, to me along the way..

Don't walk in front of me, i may not follow~ don't walk behind me, i may not lead~ walk beside me and just be my friend :)

Love Lots; Ayeem

Marriage

2008-08-05T19:16:00.000-07:00

When my turn gonna be?..I wonder...

Cinot's reception.Spot me!Spot me!

Love is a flower which turns into fruit at marriage. Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate. Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity. I would love to get married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Yet at 23, I still couldn't find that special one :( hahaha.Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution. So far away from ready...The responsibility, the expectation; that i'm afraid of. It's just too early, I think!I'm single and love to mingle :P~

p/s - Happy newlyweds cinot! :) Click at the thumbnail for a full picture view ;)

The Heart Of The Matter

2008-07-30T10:03:00.001-07:00

One of my fav songs right now. I keep listening to it over and over again like I've never been bored! Originally sang by Don Henley, the song was later covered by India Arie, the third piece from India Arie's third album;Testimony: Vol. 1, Life & Relationship.This song, means something to me. Something I'm trying to get, something I'm trying to find, something I'm trying to give; forgiveness. "The Heart of the Matter" charted on the UK Singles Chart on 1 June 2008, based on download sales alone, due to the release of the Sex and the City: The Movie soundtrack. :) So, do cherish the lyrics people..because i do!

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear

But I knew that it would come

An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone

She said you found someone

And I thought of all the bad luck,

And all the struggles we went through

How I lost me and you lost you

What are these voices outside love's open door

Make us throw off our contentment

And beg for something more?

I've been learning to live without you now

But I miss you sometimes

The more I know, the less I understand

All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning them again

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter

But my will gets weak

And my thoughts seem to scatter

But I think it's about forgiveness

Forgiveness

Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain

There's a yearning undefined

And people filled with rage

We all need a little tenderness

How can love survive in such a graceless age

And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness

They're the very things we kill, I guess

Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms

And the work they put between us,

You know it doesn't keep us warm

I've been trying to live without you now

But I miss you, baby

The more I know, the less I understand

And all the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter

But my will gets weak

And my heart is so shattered

But I think it's about forgiveness

Forgiveness

Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

All the people in your life who've come and gone

They let you down, you know they hurt your pride

Better put it all behind you; cause life goes on

You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you up inside

I wanna be happily everafter

And my heart is so shattered

But I know it's about forgiveness

Forgiveness

Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter

Because the flesh will get weak

And the ashes will scatter

So I'm thinkin' about forgiveness

Forgiveness

Even if you don't love me anymore

About me?

2008-07-29T20:11:00.000-07:00

What i think about me;

Emotional.Overreacted.Dramatic.Grumpy.Snubbish.Egoistic.Hot-tempered.Sacrastic.Stub-born.Manje.Mengade-ngade.Malas.Rude.Materialistic.Spoilt-brat.Freak.Dependant.Defensive.Moody.Conservative.Clumsy.Critical thinker.Obsessive.Sensitive.Annoying.PSYCHO :)

This is what i wrote in the 'about me' friendster section (owh how i HATE friendster!). And i think it's so describing me.What do u think?

p/s - I'm on my aim to turn my blog into a friendster testimonials/comments place.because i HATE friendster!Hahahaha~

Durian

2008-07-28T00:39:00.000-07:00

Durian!Durian!Durian!

I surf thru the online dictionary on the definitions of 'durian' .. here what i get

dictionary.com

1.the edible fruit of a tree, Durio zibethinus, of the bombax family, of southeastern Asia, having a hard, prickly rind, a highly flavored, pulpy flesh, and an unpleasant odor.
2.the tree itself.

American Heritage Dictionary

1.A tree (Durio zibethinus) of southeast Asia, bearing edible fruit.
2.The fruit of this plant, having a hard, prickly rind and soft pulp with an offensive odor but a pleasant taste.

Wordnet

1. tree of southeastern Asia having edible oval fruit with a hard spiny rind
2. huge fruit native to southeastern Asia 'smelling like Hell and tasting like Heaven'; seeds are roasted and eaten like nuts.

Webster's

The fruit of the durio. It is oval or globular, and eight or ten inches long. It has a hard prickly rind, containing a soft, cream-colored pulp, of a most delicious flavor and a very offensive odor. The seeds are roasted and eaten like chestnuts.

p/s - It's the durian season here in Malaysia. I love when we went to our durian orchard and picked the fruits under their trees. I love chasing those squirrel too. I love eating pulut durian for my dinner. Heh, i just love kampung :) ayeem pro kopek durian! :P~

Baju Raya!

2008-07-27T10:56:00.000-07:00

Oranje :D

testing 1, 2, 3

Guess what? ;) For the first time in my life i'll have kebaya for my baju raya! and that its gonna be the first in my wardrobe!Bandung made kebaya :D i went to the tailor today! can't wait to wear it~

p/s - haven't replace my fasting yet.. and i'm excited with my baju raya?haish~

Save the turtles?

2008-07-26T21:10:00.000-07:00

Slurping time!

The ping-pong look alike turtle's egg :)

Turtles, turtles, turtles, they cry to be save...crying, crying, crying just like me!The cry is just the reaction of the salty water that irritates their eyes.Me, i cry because seeing some people happy irritates me!Some sort of stupid brain reaction!Hahahaha.. Save the turtles?yep yep they are endangered species but i cant help to love their eggs. I'm sorry :,( Izzit just enough to tell i'm sorry? Somebody come and saves me too!

p/s - ayeem = turtle ? slow and vulnerable...endangered too! hahaha~!

Chicken Chop

2008-07-25T22:58:00.000-07:00

Maybe i'm in love with food. Maybe only food can makes me happy :) .. We (Mak, Achik and me) made chicken chop for lunch today... nyum2.. it's been a while.. few years after our last cooking together :)

Why So Serious?

2008-07-24T22:02:00.000-07:00

Can you avenge evil and not become it?

Revenge, punishment, repay... If i was part of it, i was no different from HIM! If HE was an evil, then i was just the same; to hold the grudge, i am the evil myself! And the devil, laughing at me, like i was laughing at HIM! If a man wished to punish another man, it would be the least destructive as God's punishment... Ya Allah, please help me to forgive and to forget... Amin...

p/s - I loved Heath Ledger. I loved HIM. Heath Ledger is dead so does HIM..people I loved, RIP... Michelle Williams is moving on and i should too! Dark Knight sgt best! :) Dark Knight was arrested! :P~ hahaha

Cloudy Cloud

2008-07-23T02:01:00.000-07:00

LCCT - Bandung Flight...clouds,clouds,the pack Indonesia from above,the beautiful islands,i see the plane's shadow, i love! :)

ayeem ; wandering around, trying to find a way to fly to the sky, free as a bird!

How sweet to be a cloud floating in the Blue!My little spirit, see, sits in a foggy cloud, and stays for me.Clouds may come, but clouds must go, and they all have a silver lining. For behind each cloud you know, the sun, or moon, is shining.The cloud never comes from the quarter of the horizon from which we watch for it.A cloud cannot cast a shadow unless the sun is shining beyond it. A cloud does not know why it moves in just such a direction and at such a speed...It feels an impulsion...this is the place to go now. But the sky knows the reasons and the patterns behind all clouds, and you will know, too, when you lift yourself high enough to see beyond horizons...Happiness is like a cloud, if you stare at it long enough, it evaporates but behind every cloud is another cloud. :)

p/s - A promise is a cloud; fulfillment is rain.

Like and Dislike

2008-07-22T05:53:00.000-07:00

I talked to a guy... a friend of mine

He said to me...

"See that chair ayeem? If you liked that chair just give 80% of your like and save 20% for dislike, and if you disliked that chair just dislike it for 80% and save your 20% for like, vice versa.You'll never know what will happen later, things might had change, a turn over. And you'll might not regret everything that much...so does in everything..if you liked or disliked something or someone "

I just smile :) I hope it was not just some sweet talkings came out from his mouth...

p/s - "When one door of happiness closes, another opens: but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us."

Bandung Part VII : Paddy field

2008-07-21T23:47:00.000-07:00

Saung Sawah, Ciwidey, Bandung

If you think life left you behind

think again ...

If you think even yourself abandon you

think again ...

Farmer works hard in the paddy field

Trying to help his family

It's not about surviving

It's about stand strong facing life

If you think you're done with life

think again ...

And if you think there is nothing left for you

think again ...

There are so much to do

to enjoy

to pray

and to appreciate

Do start again learning 'bout life from

that farmer on the paddy field

Bandung Part VI : Shopaholic's Heart

2008-07-21T00:03:00.000-07:00

First Row : Seximo, Jalan Riau Shopping Outlet, nice interior design!

Second Row:Pasar Baru, kebaya heaven!

Third Row: Paris Van Java, the biggest shopping mall in Bandung!

Forth Row: Rumah Mode, the most popular factory outlet!

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply dunno where to go shopping! The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist. When a woman depressed, they eat or go shopping.Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.If a men liked shopping, they's call it research. Shopping is better than sex;if you're not satisfied after shopping you can make an exchange for something you really like. If i like, i'll check my money, i'll buy, pure impulse shopping!

p/s - Jalan Dago, Jalan Riau, Jalan Cipaganti;Bandung Factory Outlets all explored!This is what we, women call exercise!Check out other FO if you were there; The Heritage, The Secret :)

Bandung Part V: Strawberry Kiss

2008-07-19T20:33:00.000-07:00

I've already settled on a wish! At first I wanted a lifetime of supply of strawberries...but now I think I'm gonna go for a super-cute boyfriend!:)

p/s - I eat strawberries with chicken not with cream or choc shell, tho different i think they can suit each other....Just like us; you and me.

Bandung Part IV : Kawah Putih

2008-07-19T03:15:00.000-07:00

Kawah Putih and me!

After tired of the hectic culinary or shopping tourism in northern Bandung, we visited the montane area in the south, and enjoyed the exotic panorama and the fresh, cold mountain air. The forests and tea plantations are more lush than those in the north, and offer an opportunity for natural adventures that will relieve our fatigue. Cellular signals are generally absent in the area, so we could rest assured that nobody will disturb our holiday. :) The southern tourist area of Ciwidey is located about 35 kilometers from downtown Bandung, and is quite accessible.

The first interesting site — and the favorite among visitors — is the Kawah Putih (White Crater), which looks like a lake surrounded by mountains. The water is warm and has a high sulfur content, and the sun’s rays frequently change the color of the water from milky white into bluish green.

The Kawah Putih is formed by the active volcano of Mount Patuha, situated 2,343 meters above sea level. This crater is more famous than Kawah Saat to the west of Patuha. Both craters were formed between the 10th to 12th centuries by the eruption of Mount Patuha.

Locals living around the crater once thought it to be haunted because of the many ancestral graves in the area, which was formerly called Gunung Sepuh (Mountain of the Elders). Patuha comes from the Sundanese word Patua, meaning “very old man”.

The beauty of the crater was brought to light by Dutchman Franz Wilhelm Junghuhn, who exposed it to the public in 1837. History also records that the Dutch built Zwavel Otgining Kawah Putih, a sulfur factory, in the area. During the Japanese occupation of 1942-45, the factory assumed its Japanese name, the Kawah Putih Kenzanka Gokoya Ciwidey.

Today, visitors to Kawah Putih can wade in the waters of Kawah Putih to cure minor dermatological diseases. It is said the water here can heal rashes, even eczema and ringworm.

To visit Kawah Putih, make sure that you get there before 10 a.m., because a mist descends in late morning, especially during the rainy season. The thick mist can obscure the beautiful panorama around the crater lake, the banks of which resembles a sandy beach. Nice one! :)

p/s- I still smelt sulfur!yucks~!

Don't,Don't,Don't!Don'ts!

2008-07-18T14:39:00.000-07:00

Ppl I miss :)

Just a short commerical,not actually a commercial, just a pause in between of the Bandung stories. I went to KLCC yesterday.My main agenda was to exchange the Bandung's pictures with two of my friend, Fariza and Ayesha. I was the first to arrive so I went to hang out at my favourite spot,Kinokuniya for some book readings :) I sat on the floor between the book racks, after a while a salesgirl came and told me,"Please DON'T sit on the floor,if you want to read please go to the bench area." Ok, i'd tried to find an empty bench but all seemed non-evacuated. Alas, i still sat on the floor but just next to the bench.Aish!After done exchanging the pictures, I'd decided to go for a window-shopping with Ayesha.I met a few familiar faces, Aishah,Ron and also my TKC exschoolmate, Liyana Yasmin.I just thought KLCC is a perfect place for the tv show 'Jejak Kasih' as I'll meet the most non-expected person there.I had too much stupid and sickening memories of people in KLCC anyway.Back to the story. After a few shops of window-ing i met with Emma, Balqis and Zarith on my way. So, i stopped by, started to hug and kiss them.(4 years of silence..lame tuh!). And yet after a while, a security guard came and said "Please DON'T gather here, you are blocking the way."Ok, so, we went to KFC nearby for the long talk.Then, I went to perform my Asar prayer.During the make-up time in the surau my friends blurted something that made me giggle.Another security guard came to me and asked me "Please DON'T make noise.Be quite."Haha, Ok, another warning! :P~ So, I went outside to finish up my laugh.Lastly, I made up my mind to shop for a few blouse as megasale is still on. I went to TOPSHOP to have a look.Without an intention i leaned on a mannequin near me and yes, another salesgirl came and warned me "Please DON'T lean on the mannequin".Ok, that's it.Four warning for four hours outing.Owh anyway i managed to spend my RM200 at topshop that day.Great job Ayeem!I shud remind myself, DON'T spend too much moneyshopping!hahahaI just realize there a many DOs and DON'Ts in this life. A lot of them are man made.heh and I always get the DON'Ts!Maybe it's just me, the DON'T care type of person, or maybe i'm just born to be a rules braker? Haish. No, ayeem budak baek kan?Hahaha

maturity?

Bandung Part III: Tangkuban Parahu

2008-07-18T12:59:00.000-07:00

Tangkuban Parahu

The scenery, amazing, just like a painting behind me! The weather, nice, perfect lighting for perfect camera snapping :)!So here goes, the camera whore and the non-potential-model-to-be in Tangkuban Parahu :P~

Tangkuban Perahu, or Tangkuban Parahu in local Sundanese dialect, is an active volcano 30 km north of the city of Bandung, the provincial capital of West Java, Indonesia. It is a popular tourist attraction where tourists can hike or ride to the edge of the crater to view the hot water springs upclose, and buy eggs cooked on its hot surface. This stratovolcano is on the island of Java and last erupted in 1983.Its elevation is about 7,000 feets from the sea and it was a lil cold up there!

In April 2005 the Directorate of Volcanology and Geological Hazard Mitigation raised an alert, forbidding visitors from going up the volcano. "Sensors on the slopes of the two mountains - Anak Krakatoa on the southern tip of Sumatra Island and Tangkuban Perahu in Java - picked up an increase in volcanic activity and a build up of gases, said government volcanologist Syamsul Rizal."

There is a local legend of the Mountain.The name translates roughly to "upturning of (a) boat" or "upturned boat" in Sundanese, referring to the local legend of its creation. The story tells of "Dayang Sumbi", a beauty who lived in West Java. She cast away her son "Sangkuriang" for disobedience, and in her sadness was granted the power of eternal youth by the gods. After many years in exile, Sangkuriang decided to return to his home, long after the two had forgotten and failed to recognize each other. Sangkuriang fell in love with Dayang Sumbi and planned to marry her, only for Dayang Sumbi to recognize his birthmark just as he was about to go hunting. In order to prevent the marriage from taking place, Dayang Sumbi asked Sangkuriang to (1) build a dam on the river Citarum and (2) build a large boat to cross the river, both before the sunrise. Sangkuriang meditated and summoned mythical ogre-like creatures -buta hejo or green giant(s)- to do his bidding. Dayang Sumbi saw that the tasks were almost completed and called on her workers to spread red silk cloths east of the city, to give the impression of impending sunrise. Sangkuriang was fooled, and upon believing that he had failed, kicked the dam and the unfinished boat, resulting in severe flooding and the creation of Tangkuban perahu from the hull of the boat.

Tho there are many souvenir sold up there, the driver warned us to buy anything from them as most of them were cheating the tourist.Just imagine, the price for a stupid keychain is RM2!And the sellers were like forcing us to buy their things!My friends did buy belerang(sulfur) from the nearby stall as that the ony thing that we thot worth it to buy.Anyhow, we can't get such things from other places in Bandung City for much cheaper price as the belerang were taken from the deep down the dead volcano. They said that belerang is good for our skin. I dunno, i havent try it yet and i dun think i will because i hate the smell.It made me cough and that severe cough still not getting well even after few days at arriving in Malaysia.

p/s- I'm still *sick* today! And i think i'm addicted to cough syrup!help me!

Bandung Part II : Foods Crave

2008-07-17T22:53:00.000-07:00

Sleep 'til you're hungry, eat 'til you're sleepy!haha :)

What I like about Indonesia is FOOD. I am never choosy about food. I eat and try everything. On my visit i ended up finishing my money for food :) tho, it wasn't that expensive to eat there. I've tried Padang, Minang, Jogja and Sunda foods and they all were delicious!Teh Botol is Indonesian's favourite drink.Have a sip and you won't regret!

Ok, let me start crapping about the food, the first food i want to introduce is Nasi Mawut.Nasi Mawut means extraordinary rice. It's basically a fried rice, what's extraordinary about it is because there are noodle in the rice and a whole bunch of other unusual ingredients. There are fried shrimp ball (not shrimp, but shrimp ball), sawi (veggies), gizzard and heart (The rice then was fried with the special sauce.It's spicy and a bit sweet. It's served with pickled cucumber (acar), and Shrimp cracker (kerupuk).

Next one i want to introduce is Bakmi.Bakmi is literally translated to English as "meat noodles". Bakmi was brought to Indonesia by Chinese merchants, and is today a common dish especially in Indonesian Chinatowns. The dish has also been further developed to more closely align with Indonesian tastes. Bakmi is between Chinese style noodles and Japanese Udons in thickness, and there are several variants of bakmi in Indonesia.e.g Bakmi Godhok, Bakmi Nyemek and Bakmi Goreng.

One of my favourite food in Bandung is Mie Kocok Kaki Sapi Bakso. Mie Kocok is the special food in Bandung.Something the people in Bandung will talk about.The famous Mie Kocok includes veggie (tauge,sawi), yellow mee, soup and cow's leg.It is usually sold in hawker stalls along the road.It priced between Rp 7,000 to Rp 8000 (about RM2-3).

The fourth dish to introduce is Nasi Timbel. I myself have no idea what does 'Timbel' mean, anyway, nasi Timbel consists of rice (wrapped in banana leaf), lalapan/raw vegetables (tomatoes, cucumber, long beans, Lemon Basil etc), sambal terasi (shrimp-paste chili sauce), tempe (made of fermented soybean), tahu (fried beancurd), ayam goreng (fried chicken) or gurame goreng (fried fish), empal (fried beef), and ikan asin (salted fish). This is one of my favorite Indonesian dishes, Indonesian love hot and spicy foods, most of them always include 'sambal' in their meals, tasty!

The belly rules the mind!

Last but not least, the Siomay Bandung.A light meal which has a similarity form like the Chinese Dim Sum, shaped like ice cream cone except the bottom is flat and made traditionally from mackerel fish meat served with peanut sauce. Sometimes the main ingredient can be made from prawn and other fish also. Siomay is eaten with a peanut paste, sweet soy sauce and a dash of lime juice. Other complements to siomay bandung are steamed cabbage, steamed potatoes, steamed bitter gourd and steamed tofu.

There are a lot more food to enlight here but i guess the above ' food tale' is more than enough. Other dishes that i think worth to try are; Nasi Remes, Nasi Uduk (kinda similiar with Nasi Lemak Malaysia), Lotek, Lontong, Nasi Soto Betawi, Surabi, Soto, Bakso, Batagor, Otak-Otak, Pepes ikan, Iga Bakar,Lomie, Nasi Gila, Kupat Tahu,Eskrim Durian and Kikil Cimandiri.

p/s- Food!Food!Food! I Love food!That's why ayeem gemoks!

Bandung Part I : Donuts

2008-07-17T05:35:00.000-07:00

yep, yep donuts make me do-nuts :D

What I regonized about Indonesia is DONUTS.When I first arrived in Bandung, I could see donuts and coffee retailers everywhere; from Dunkin Donuts to J.CO Donuts. Even, there are also donuts sales in Pasar Baru!I was a lil envious as in Malaysia we don't have such.I do love donuts so much but in Ipoh i can only get Big Apple Donut, neither Dunkins nor J.COs. At arriving we went to Cihampelas Walk to get a taste of the donuts :) We stopped by at J.CO Donuts to have a bite :P~J.Co is the fastest growing donut & coffee chain in South-East Asia. As of May 2008, J.CO operates 38 outlets through out Southeast-Asian countries namely Indonesia, Malaysia, and Singapore. The company planned to expand its chain in the Philippines in mid 2008. I've tried J.CO Donuts earlier in Malaysia before. I've went to both of their franchise in Malaysia; in Pavillion KL and Sunway Pyramid, but to eat the J.CO Donut at its originate country was my first time experience, and it was like being in donuts heaven :)

p/s- www.jcodonuts.com/ get a peek of my fav donuts and webie :)

Three Wise Monkeys

2008-07-15T04:07:00.000-07:00

See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil

I found this in Soekarno-Hatta International Airport gift shop. I dunno what to buy as the souvenir during my seven days visits to Indonesia at first, but after a while I found the three monkeys kinda interesting :) so i wasted my 100,000 rupiah (RM33) for these stuffs.“See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil" is a common phrase, usually used to describe someone who doesn’t want to be involved in a situation. But where did the saying originate?Unfortunately, no one knows for sure how it evolved. Because the saying is typically associated with three monkeys one covering his eyes, one covering his ears, and the other covering his mouth it is believed that the saying may have its origin in a 17th century temple in Japan. The Nikko Toshogo Shrine, also known as the Sacred Stable, in Japan has a carving of three wise monkeys. Many scholars believe the monkeys were carved as a visual representation of the religious principle, “If we do not hear, see, or speak evil, we ourselves shall be spared all evil." Others believe that the saying originated from a Japanese play on words. “See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil," translated into Japanese is, “mizaru, kikazaru, iwazaru." The Japanese word for monkey is “saru", and sounds very similar to the verb-ending “zaru". It is easy to see how the saying may have originated from a fun play on words. The only problem with this explanation is that the three wise monkeys aren’t originally from Japan.In the eighth century A.D. a Buddhist monk from China introduced the three wise monkeys to Japan. They were associated with a fearsome blue-faced deity called Vadjra. It is believed that the monkeys’ gestures were a representation of a command of the deity to “see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil."Just as there is disagreement about the origin of the phrase, there are differing explanations of the meaning of “see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil." Some contend that it is a proverb reminding us not to be so snoopy, so nosy, and so gossipy. Others say that it is a warning to stay away from places where immoral acts are taking place. Whatever the origin and meaning of “see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil," it is one of the most visual phrases in existence. It’s impossible to hear it spoken without thinking of three wise, but very cute, little monkeys :)

p/s - i wonder how these three monkeys came to Indonesia..wonder..wonder..world :)

Best Friend :)

2008-07-05T20:45:00.000-07:00

I don't know what I'd ever do without you

From the beginning to the end

You've always been here right beside me

So I'll call you my best friend

Through the good times and the bad ones

Whether I lose or If I win

I know one thing that never changes and

That's you as my best friend

p/s - after 10 years and we are still together :)

Thanks Alin! :)

Chinta

2008-07-01T11:39:00.000-07:00

Chinta by Monoloque

kau hadir bila tiba waktunya
tidak diundang tak jua di pinta
walau ku lari namun kau tetap datang jua
keranamu chinta tak mampu menahannya
aku terus mencuba untuk lari dari chinta
kerana perit terasa sengsara tanpa kata kerana dusta

chinta kau luhurkan hati ini membuat segalanya indah
walau sesekali menjengah tiba oh chinta
terasa bahagia
hanya menunggu saat dan tika

aku akan terus melangkah walau tak perlu oh chinta
aku yakin akan agungnya setianya ceritera yang tiada akhirnya

chinta abadi chinta
chinta padaNya
chinta satu
chinta selamanya

Happy

2008-07-01T08:27:00.000-07:00

I'm just being happy today..for no reason..i dunno why, maybe it was just dis hormone stuffs :D I found dis quote..Sumthing for us to ponder..sumthing that helps me in my search for my happiness :) I do miss HAPPY..where are you HAPPY??Just smile and everthing will be fine!Aite?

There is no better time than right now to be happy. Happiness is a journey, not a destination. So work like you don't need money, love like you've never been hurt, and, dance like no one's watching. Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

~Marianne Williamson~

Lucky?

2008-06-30T15:55:00.000-07:00

Scenario 1
She : I'd been molested.
He : You are LUCKY, you were not being rape.

Scenario 2
She : I'd been raped.
He : You are LUCKY, you were not pregnant.

Scenario 3
She : I'd been raped and I'm pregnant.
He : You are LUCKY, he didn't kill you.

Ohh people, by saying that she is LUCKY is NOT the way to comfort her. It's enough for her to live her life with the burden. Who is the LUCKY one actually???LELAKI??? LUCKY and LELAKI..rhythm uh??

p/s - just sumthing to ponder..mind off if it was sensitive for you!

Old friends, New comebacks

2008-06-30T15:27:00.001-07:00

After so much things happened to me lately, i realized, i gained a lot especially in my social circles. Old friends, people i left for few years suddenly pop-up in front of me. People i used to let go and sacrifice during my social retreat years suddenly came back into my life. :) I'm flattered..I was just like waking up from my very long-long sleep. to realize how friendship means so much to me..to know which REAL friends are there through thick and thin.. to start trusting people back.. to gain back my social confidence.. I have learned a lot!Thank you for always be there friends :)

p/s- F.L.O.W.E.R (Friendships Like Ours Will Eternally Remain)

Dreams

2008-06-27T15:39:00.000-07:00

Ayeem self portrait minus the curly hair. :P~Just my masterpiece i did on my so called bored day; today :D Using some brushes in adobe photoshop cs2 i managed to come out with the idea. It wasn't that good but enough to satisfy me :) I dreamt to be a designer long-long time ago but i ended up doing engineering...weird weird world huh?I have 2 friends whose dream to be rock stars and politicians..they believe they sumday will create sumthing big to the world..ambitious!Insyaalah..there always a will if we want sumthing..shoot for the moon even if u fail, u still be among the stars :) Good Luck dears! Do leave your comment on dis . merci! :)

p/s - you dun always get what u want. but u always get what u need :) Allah maha adil~

Shoes!Shoes!Shoes!

2008-06-26T02:14:00.000-07:00

Let me tell you, i am a shoe addict :) everytime i went out for a shopping spree i will look out for shoes! and shoes is always my priority when i have money to spend...it's been a few months i didn't go for shoes hunting..but i still have a long list of shoes i want :) hunting for shoes is like hunting for your partner..you want to find a pair of shoes who fit you..comfortable to wear ..and look good on you..something that can match your wearings..and always support also protect you from dirt and harm..same like our partner! Frankly, i'm so into guys with shoes :D sport shoes especially!I also judge people thru shoes.. like me, i'm always end up with complicated and gonna-hurt-my-feet shoes...my mom called it, the shoes that eat my feet..that's why i always keep plaster or bandage in my bag :P~ same with my love life..it's always complicated and hurts and it eats my heart inside!Looking at other people..people who likes to wear other people's shoes are like to steal other people's property..even girlfrens/boyfrens! They are more interested with other people property instead of theirs even it dun match them (i know one!). And people who don't care what shoes they are wearing are people who dun care about their life...like..anything will do..i-dun-care-if-i-look-stupid!Sandals and flip flops are for simple people...they are more open minded people(i think!).One more thing..people can look at your shoes and they can comment about it!OK, enough comparing shoes with life!

I dun wear heels..because i had problem with it...maybe i'm too clumsy or maybe i'm not that stable.. I still remember i slipped off in front Dato' Sharizat Jalil during my graduation night certificate giving due to my high heels. Yeah, of course people laughed at me and since then i rarely wear one.Thank you high heels!I did wear heels during my internship a year ago but only in my office. I went to work in flip flops and changed them after that :P~ somehow high heels will hurt my ankle badly, so i dun really prefer them tho i am short!If the shoe fit then wear it!If it doesnt why we must change the feet?If you find someone who fit you, love him/her..If he/she doesn't fit you..why you have to change yourself?

My list of wanted shoes start with this shoe ;

I saw this shoe in Jaya Jusco Ipoh a few months ago. I've done collecting RM210 for the shoes :) yeay!This is a santa cruz Crocs shoes coloured with white/lapis pat. This laid back shoe provide casual beach style. I'm loving it!I just love slip-on canvas shoes!

This is my second crave..heh :) uppity-rhino red by marc ecko :D i saw this shoe in Sunway pyramid when i was window shopping with Alin.. I really love the rhinestone accented forefoot strap and rubber outsole. Suke..suke..suke..!mau..mau..mau!

p/s- How about living in ayeem's shoe for a day?

Puisi

2008-06-25T20:33:00.000-07:00

I snoozed off in my tears. I woke up still in cry. But I turned around and I smiled. :) I got a few short-message-services. I read. I laughed. A poem to be exact and like this, part of it sounds…

Setelah, beberapa purnama, Tergamam ku seketika seolah tersentak dari lama tidurku.Kau hadir kembali, jiwaku beronak keceriaan,Bunga-bunga mekar kembali,Burung-burung berkicauan gembira, Mentari muncul memancar sinar…

Ewah!..never read such things..funny..it did made me laugh! Thank you. I do really appreciate it…Thank you for your help.. Thank you for your support.. Thank you for making me laugh :)

p/s - Aku tidak tahu berpuitis. Maafkan aku :P~

Brushes

2008-06-25T05:13:00.000-07:00

Today, i tried to pile up and load different brushes in adobe photoshop to made a 400x100 canvas effect tag. I wasted my whole day downloading different .abr files from the internet and the best webie i cud find the best brushes is http://www.brusheezy.com/ (try it!). I dun really have that talent to make my own brushes using adobe illustrator, so it's better for me just to use those brushes i've already downloaded from the internet. :) haha..senang-cepat-mudah! Tho there are many complicated brushes to download i just picked the cute ones as i'm just a newbie in this. Unfortunately my trial to make a chantek tag turned into disaster and emi did laugh out at it. I tried again but again but still, it looked hideous!But, i still dun have the shame to promote my bad artwork here, in my blog..So, here goes my-'art'work-i-did-when-i-was-so-bored..any comment will do..positive or negative i just dun care!trying to improve myself with the talent that i lacked of..and do compare mine with emi's...*sigh*..

my first attempt :)

my second attempt :)

emi's ; trying to promote me ;)

p/s - creative??? so-not-me!

The Lies and Betrayal

2008-06-24T20:23:00.000-07:00

SHATTERED, furious, resentful, heartbroken, numb, humiliated, rejected, hurt, and NOT SAFE – these are just some of the feelings we experience when we’ve been betrayed.

Many people hear the word, "betrayal", and think of infidelity, yet the experience is actually much broader. Yes, the hurt feelings can result from a love betrayal, but the same symptoms can also be triggered by an unfaithful coworker or boss; betrayal in a friendship; disloyalty from a workplace, community, even country; the earth appearing to turn on us; or what is sometimes described as the ultimate betrayal - a loss of trust or faith in our relationship with “something bigger, something spiritual”. Regardless of the source, the emotional distress is often severe.

A friend knowingly breaks a confidence that causes hurt and loss of reputation; this is betrayal... A spouse professes love and loyalty while involved in an emotional affair outside the marriage; this is betrayal... A boss or organization pretends to be honest and fair while manipulating employees to exploit their talents; this is betrayal...What do these examples of broken trust have in common?

Personal and/or cultural expectations (understood by the betrayed as “The Truth”) are present.
Based on these expectations, whole-hearted loyalty is given to another.
"The Truth" is shattered; often due to someone making choices despite potential, major damage to the relationship.
Shock and intense hurt feelings inevitably result.

Unfortunately, betrayals appear to be on the rise. It helps to know that we are not alone as broken trust is a universal experience.The human need to belong and be part of a relationship makes us open and therefore vulnerable to these painful emotions. An act of betrayal can hurt as much as, if not more than, a physical injury, but the trauma resides not in the body but in the mental/emotional/spiritual realm – our subtle energy fields. If we think of betrayal as a wound to the energy system, it follows that to heal; we must acknowledge and work with this same energy system.

p/s - “The harder you fall the higher you bounce” - Horace (Circa 35 B.C.E.) so get up and bounce higher ayeem!

Canon EOS 400D Digital

2008-06-24T03:51:00.000-07:00

The spirit of photography!My dream camera; the EOS 400D !

I wish..i wish.. i wish for the camera for my birthday...oh dear fairy..dear angel..dear genie...dear whatever...i want one..can aaaa? :( A snap of memory...A photograph is memory in the raw...looking at the family picture where everyone was smiling...a fake smile.. that was the time when a moment stop and the fake of life captured.. looking the world thru a camera lens...what we'll see?? yup, the meaning of life, reality....even it is a fake!The photograph can tell us nothing more than what we see with our own eyes, there is another in which it proves to us how little our eyes permit us to see.All photos are accurate. None of them is the truth.The camera cannot lie, but it can be an accessory to untruth. A photograph can't tell the truth of what a photographer actually sees. The truth; that's what i want to seek and look for!

p/s- why i want a camera? because i want to fake my life, i want to be a fake and i want to see the fake..enough saying~

Haircut

2008-06-23T06:53:00.000-07:00

Just got my haircut..a new one.. because i'm really sick of my long-long hair..it has been half a year i didn't do anything to it...and it has been a few months i didn't care about my looks and appearances...the hair dresser said it will be a lost to cut my chantek long original wavy hair..but who cares??..he used to loved it too and he ended up chasing for the rebonded one...yeah, too much sweet words!I even suffered hair lost because of that...3 years of stressed!So, by cutting my hair short is a way to get rid of all my trauma...that hairdresser told me..yeah, i wish for that trauma to be gone..i really wish...back to basic..to ayeem-who-never-keep-her-hair-long-before!

p/s- next; facial treatment n make over class...hahahaha leisure!

Truffles, Chocolate truffles

2008-06-22T19:56:00.000-07:00

Achik just got back from Russia for her holidays. Just like past years, we will have stacks of chocolates in our fridge..and as usual i'll be the one who gonna finish every single bite of it..nyum2 :) Chocolate just like drug...love drug and lust drug...drug that can fake our happiness and even orgasm!Due to some circumstances, my chocoholism is getting worst from day to day..i think i am addicted to tryptophan and phenylethylamine in it! (tho they only present in chocs in very small quantity..hehs)..One of my favourite is TRUFFLES...

Chocolate truffles are a group of chocolate confectionery, traditionally made with a chocolate ganache center coated in chocolate or cocoa powder, usually in a spherical, conical or curved shape. Other fillings may replace the ganache: cream, melted chocolate, caramel, nuts, almonds, berries or other assorted sweet fruits, nougat, fudge or toffee, mint, chocolate chips, marshmallow and popularly liquor. They are named for their resemblance to the truffle fungus. (same ke?hahaha..see below pictas to compare choc truffles and tuber genus a.k.a truffle fungus :P~)...These truffles i'm eating are the "European truffle"which is made with syrup and a base made up of cocoa powder, milk powder, fats, and other such ingredients to create an oil-in-water type emulsion.Very nice.... nyum2 :)

<----Chocolate truffles

Truffles fungus---->

p/s - There are four basic food groups: milk chocolate, dark chocolate, white chocolate, and chocolate truffles. -Anonymous

Sorry

2008-06-19T19:48:00.000-07:00

A bad apology is worse than no apology. If you sed sorry to someone do you really meant it?Halfhearted or insincere apologies often worse than not apologizing at all because recipients find them insulting.A good apology is like an antibiotic; a bad apology is like rubbing salt in the wound.

Two example of bad apologies are;

1) Apology with an attempt at an emotional slave; to hurt...
2) Giving an apology but asking for one back!

Proper apology contains three parts;
1)What i did was wrong.
2)I feel bad for what i did.
3)How to make things better.

So, be sincere...If we apologized and the other person didnt apologize back,don't let it eat at you.. that's not something we can control :)

p/s - Do not envy a sinner, you dunno what disaster awaits him :)

Gua Tempurung Exploration

2008-06-18T22:24:00.001-07:00

One of the most majestic white marble and limestone towers in Malaysia is the Gunung Tempurung; the wondrous cave.Concealed within this limestone massif is an intricate system of caves of various dimensions honeycombed inside the limestone hills. These caves are actually a breathtaking gallery of stalagmites and stalactites and other amazing rock formations which are superb speleological wonders found only in this part of the world.The cave meanders under the limestone hill and forms a tunnel of wondrous and endless rock formations that runs from east to west, nearly 2 km in length.

“They see only their own shadows or the shadows of one another, which the fire throws on the opposite wall of the cave”- Plato

This was my first time exploring cave. :) Actually this CAVING activity happened a month ago, but it cud be interesting if i shared it here.We took The Grand Tour package priced RM 22 for an adult and RM11 for a children. THE GRAND TOUR is a complete catwalk journey from the entrance with full-length underground river adventure. It was a very challenging and strenuous tour, for about three and a half hour. It was fun! Somewhat, fascinating!Yup, at the of the end of the journey we were really exhausted but of course we were having a good time; crawling, sliding and climbing in the DARK :) !Raje, Chuna, Suria, Nash, Cikwin, Kaydee, and Darwish....thanks for the memories :) WORTH it!

p/s- i saw ELEPHANT look-alike lime stones.. :D

Jeanne D'Arc

2008-06-18T08:26:00.000-07:00

Joan Of Arc's map in Age Of Empires II : The Ages of Kings

Joan of Arc was a farmer's daughter with an extraordinary mission: to break the English siege of Orleans (ancient seat of the French kings) and restore the Valois heir to the throne of France.

Inspired since the age of 13 by voices (according to Joan, the saints Michael, Catherine, and Margaret), she enlisted the aid of a French captain to gain audience with the Dauphin*. Convincing Charles* and his staff of theologians of her divine calling, she was assigned royal troops to carry out her mission.Joan dressed and armed herself as a man* (to the horror of her later judges), but it was her energy and confidence that inspired her followers more than her prowess in battle. Her amazing successes in liberating Orleans (May 1429), defeating the English at Patay*, and crowning the Dauphin at Rheims were quickly attributed by her enemies to black magic; captured by Burgundians early in 1430, she was sold to the English and put on trial for witchcraft and heresy (claiming direct communication with God).

She endured harsh treatment bravely, then recanted and was sentenced to life imprisonment. But she later resumed dressing as a man, and, abjuring her confession, was burnt at the stake. Charles' coronation was symbolically a major setback to the English; by raising French morale Joan's example contributed greatly to turn the tide of the Hundred Years War, well earning the Duke of Bedford's (and Shakespeare's*) sour portrayal of her as "a disciple and limb of the fiend."

Joan Of Arc the movie starring Milla Jovovich

Joan of Arc..my mIRC nickname since i was in form 2 (till now!).. back then when i was so obsessed with history.. obsessed with my 3rd language subject, French.. obsessed with gaming;playing AOE with buyoh :)... obsessed with Milla Jovovich (till now!).. hehe.. after all it was just an obsessive me :) i even used above poster as my desk's wrapper!Joan of Arc..an idol of high class woman warrior ... *singing She's so high by Everclear*

"'Cause she's so highHigh above me, she's so lovelyShe's so high, like Cleopatra, Joan of Arc, or AphroditeShe's so high, high above me"

p/s - Joan Of Arc; an early feminist?

Pantai Irama Bachok

2008-06-18T03:01:00.000-07:00

I have always loved the beach. The smell of the salty water, the wind in my face, the gentle roar of the waves all combine to create a sense of peace and calm.Play in the sand; splash in the water; get dirty; get wet. It’s hard for me to put into words why I like the beach so much. Everything about it is renewing for me, almost like therapy...Beach Therapy..The waves are like sweeping away all my sorrow.In every outthrust headland, in every curving beach, in every grain of sand there is the story of the earth. :) The waves of the sea...Help me get back to me!

Lucky me, i found 5 bucks note on the beach :P~

"Our memories of the ocean will linger on, long after our footprints in the sand are gone"

"As the ocean is never full of water, so is the heart never full of love"

p/s - a house by the beach; i wish....

Unconscious mind

2008-06-17T21:54:00.000-07:00

The unconscious or subconscious mind, according to classical Freudian psychoanalysis, is a "part" of the mind that stores repressed memories. The theory of repression maintains that some experiences are too painful to be reminded of, so the mind stuffs them in the cellar. These painful repressed memories manifest themselves in neurotic or psychotic behavior and in dreams. However, there is no scientific evidence either for the unconscious repression of traumatic experiences or their causal agency in neurotic or psychotic behavior.

The unconscious mind is also thought by some, such as Jung and Tart, to be a reservoir of transcendent truths. There is no scientific evidence that this is true.

It would be absurd to reject the notion of the unconscious mind simply because we reject the Freudian notion of the unconscious as a reservoir of repressed memories of traumatic experiences. We should recognize that it was Freud more than anyone else who forced us to recognize unconscious factors as significant determinants of human behavior. Furthermore, it seems obvious that much, if not most, of one's brain's activity occurs without our awareness. There is no question that we sense many things without being consciously aware of them There is also no question that unconscious factors can affect behavior or motor action There is little question that many unconscious factors drive such complex phenomena as language ability. Consciousness or self-awareness is obviously the proverbial tip of the iceberg. But most interest in the unconscious mind has been restricted to potentially harmful memories that might be stored or stirring there, memories of bad experiences that influence our conscious behavior even though we are unaware of their impact. Others have shown interest in the unconscious mind as a reservoir of universal truths or a place where the "true self" dwells. Neither of these views seems well supported by the empirical evidence. - Skepdic.com

If i cud control my conscious mind... Can i control these unconscious mind thingy too? I'm sick of nightmares...I'm sick of uncontrollable heart beats...I'm sick of throwing out when i saw him...I'm sick that i cudnt sleep...I'm sick of shivering when i open my eyes...make me sick of my life..they sed time will heal..but when?

p/s- Mind and brain can be EXTREMELY complex.

A Guy, Flowers and A Cat

2008-06-16T23:17:00.000-07:00

I asked him..."What a woman worth to you?"..He replied..."The WORLD.." I smiled...Remembering our good old days..we still have the 'chemistry'..and he will be always a friend of mine...a friend who tries to make me SMILE..and i did.. i did SMILE :)... Lucky for his girl ;) That guy in the picture, with flowers and the cat will come to me sumday...and i'm gonna worth his WORLD...Ameen

p/s - picture courtesy to SOLE :)

Paranoia

2008-06-16T07:48:00.000-07:00

The trauma of my personal war was past, but the taste of peace was far from sweet. I reflected often on the emotional scars I had acquired in such a short lifetime; sadly, all my wounds had been inflicted by men. As a result, I could hold not even one member of opposite sex in high esteem. I, being paranoid.....

Princess

2008-06-15T23:39:00.000-07:00

The classic international bestseller...'Princess' the true story of life inside Saudi Arabia's royal family by Jean Sasson...(thanks kerel for the books!)..here is the synopsis of the book i'm reading right now.. :)

'Princess is a testimony to a woman of indomitable spirit and great courage. By speaking out, 'Sultana' risks the wrath of the Saudi establishment and for this reason, she had told her story anonymously through the best selling aouthor Jean Sasson. For the first time, a real Saudi woman opens the door to give readers an unvarnished look inside a closed society. ' Sultana' life the veil on the shocking world of forced marriages, sex slavery, honours killings and other outrages against women, both royal and common.'

The book questioned about the worth of woman to men. What is the meaning of women existance to men? companionship or just pleasure? The issue touched kinda scary yet thoughtful :) ..Yup, a lil bit sexist..haha..i recommend the book to all..(women of betrayal especially :P~)..I learned a lot from the book..from the history of Saudi royal monarchy to the laws of Saudi Arabia.. interesting... more interesting.. it quotes words from Khalil Gibran..and other ancient proverb..menareks!

p/s- ayeem the feminist? :)

Initiate

2008-06-02T00:36:00.000-07:00

Aperkah pendapat anda if a girl initiate a guy first?Even Siti Khadijah initiate Rasulullah dulu. Well, i know it's not wrong but looking at things nowdays this is my opinion. Aku wat survey among dis 5 guys..3 of them cakap pompuan tuh gedik...huh? 2 of them cakap "laki suke kot pompuan initiate dulu" :) i shud change dat sentences to "laki suke kot kalo pompuan LAWA initiate dulu". bile aku cakap camtuh dis guy cakap..it's common things, mcm if lelaki initiate pon that girl must first look at his outter look. From my opinion pompuan lawa mmg tayah initate because she knows guys are chasing for her. Tp if pompuan lawa tuh initate that means die tengah testing power :)...Dan pompuan2 yang tak lawa (cam aku!) initiate sbb desperate... percentage yg succeed pon just a few..(sbb the guy yg derang initiate mmg dah suke kat derang)ye la kan kate tak cantik..laki makin siket kat dunie nih competition makin sengit...soh for these initiators to get their place in his heart makin la susah...typical guys tgk skin n body...i'm not sexist, it's just a reality...tp ade gak org cakap artist yg cantik pon kne dump...ok..name one!...usually artist yg cantik kne dump sbb her guys jumpe artist yg lagik cantik and mude...it's just too obvious :) pompuan initiate mmg applicable in dis modern world..but for me it's not the true love...n i'm still waiting for my prince to come and initiate me :) yup conservative thinking but that's just me ;ayeem.

p/s - i might dun have the looks..but i have my brain n my PRIDE n heart too :)

mIRC

2008-06-01T00:38:00.000-07:00

The reminiscence..in the memory of #9802...

Just some memories...mase dolu2 24 jam chatting mirc...mase dolu2 bising ramai2 kat depan channel pon aku tak kesah..mase dolu2 aku sanggup edit ascii arts sndrik...mase dolu2 popups ngan remotes leh program sndrik...mase dolu2 mirc scripts lebih dari satu...mase dolu2 sume logs aku simpan...mase dolu2 aku bangge jadik founder memane channel yg ramai..mase dolu2 aku gembira dapat kick ban slap org...mase dolu2 aku hafal sume command..mase dolu2....tgk header aku pon dah jangkit :) mase sekarang? "watpe nk masuk MIRC? tade sape nk private message pon..haha" yup, people are ignorance nowdays..time change, people do change too.. org kate lagi tue lagi knal ramai org..lagik ramai kawan..asal aku end up alone? pelik tapi benar :)

p/s - cinta mIRC itu mengarut :)